Son Abusing Me?

Hard day yesterday.

I read an article about kids abusing their parents and started a hard talk with Ex and Son's therapist. Son is verbally and emotionally abusive, and borderline physically abusive to Daughter and I. Ex and I were talking about switching the custody time around so he had them Mon-Thurs and I have them Fri-Sun, except one weekend a month. With flexibility for plans and trips, etc. Ex said he was willing to manage the bulk of the homework and scheduling so Son can't fight with me about it.

I feel ashamed that I can't manage my kid and that he bullies me.

I'm going to start going to a group with a friend and coworker next week for parents who are codependent with their kids Thursday nights.

And I have a phone meeting with Son's therapist today at 1230.

We would have the regular schedule for summer time, then we decided not to change the schedule. We worry that it might make things worse. It makes Ex the bad guy and I see the kids less.

Mostly we decided against the schedule because Ex realized how much extra work he'd have...I was ready to totally rearrange my life and schedule - but both kids were so upset about the change we read them the riot act then moved on with our day.
It did go better last night at my house...a little smoother. Everyone was being careful and mindful, including me.

I don't know what the answer is. We all had a come to Jesus talk and hopefully we got through to them. Daughter's been lying to me too. Very disappointing.

Ex said he's worried that Son is on the border of becoming a delinquent...I agree. He's skipped 7 classes (the same class) and is failing PE because he doesn't change into PE clothes, get this: because he doesn't want to run before he lifts weights.

...

Seriously. Who wants to run? But wow, he's willing to take grief from his teachers and his parents just so he doesn't have to deal with things he doesn't like.

His view of the future is so skewed...I'm lost.

Hopefully the phone call with his therapist today will enlighten me.